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SoulPlunderer
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This really gets on my nerves! The Rolling Stones must be the most unappreciated band ever! Maybe its just cause they've seemingly always been around. Anyway, Who the f---ing hell is Zane Lowe, and who has decided that he should be accepted as the Mecca of music?
On his show, Zane Lowes top 50 Guitar legends (note that this doesn't particularly mean most technically gifted!) where do you think he placed Keith? number 1 naturally? Nope. Well maybe he ain't as big a stones fan as us but still the top ten, naturally yeah? Nope. Keith was 17th. number 17!!!!!! Please, please, please name me 16 guitarists who are iconic the Keith! You'd be hard pressed to do so.
Onto another of Zane Lowes polls. Greatest Rock n Roll stars. This time, they didn't number them on srceen so I didn't know what place the Stones were but it was made clear that the band played last were the best and so on. So on come the stones about halfway through the show in the form of the IORR video. Alright! So i'm interested to see who he considers is more "rock n roll" than the stones. So who comes on next? Eminem of course! Yeah, some white-boy rapper who's never touched a guitar in his life is more "rock n roll" than the worlds greatest rock n roll band!!! Nonsense!
Now on to my favourite Oasis fanzine, Q magazine. Whats the greatest album of all time? I n my opinion its Exile but thats obviously not going to be the case for this list. The top two albums are both by the same band. Who, the Beatles? No, of course not. That would make far too much sense. Its Radiohead. They seem to be one of these depressing bands that all the musical snobs love cause it makes them seem sophistocated. Sorry, I'd rather have music that is fun. Music can be enjoyable, well written AND fun you know. By the way, Exile wasn't even in the top 30!!!
Q did another list recently. Greatest Frontman of all time. Surely there can only be one. The one the only, Sir Michael Phillip, or as we all call him, Mick Jagger!!! Nah, its Liam Gallagher actually. An arrogant poser who thinks he's John Lennon. At least give us someone who moves around a bit on stage. No, not at all. Number two, Bono! Christ almighty!
Here's their whole top ten:
1) Liam Gallagher 2) Bono 3) Freddie Mercury 4) Damon Albarn 5) Chris Martin 6) Matt Bellamy 7) Jim Morrison 8) Bob Marley 9) Paul McCartney 10) John Lennon
I don't know wheather to laugh, cry or vomit!!! Chris Martin!!!! How rock n roll! Matt Bellamy? *tumbleweed* Don't get all the fuss over Muse. So are ALL of these people better than Mick? NO Are ANY of these frontmen better than Mick? NO Where did our man finish in the list anyway? 13th. 13th! Bloody Hell!!!!!!!!!!!! So, who were the other two who were deemed better than Mick? Debbie Harry. I don't mind a bit of Blondie but no. Just no. Robbie Williams!!!!! Please tell me this is a joke! He's not actually in a band, so how can he be a frontman? I doubt Mick has even seen the list, let alone care about it, but I think he should be deeply offended!
Ok. So my venom-fueled rant is over. But now I would like to apeal to these pollsters. I know that musical taste is a matter of personal opinion, but please stop putting music that is current or depressing at the top of "greatest of all time" lists. I know you only do it to try and sould, relevent, sophisticated and clever, but it actually makes you seem uneducated. Please, I beg of you, sit down, open up your ears, turn the volume on your radio, sterio, whatever to full, stick on Brown Sugar or somethin, and let the Worlds Greatest Rock N Roll band bring you to your senses!
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