PartyDoll MEG wrote on Oct 15
th, 2008 at 11:10pm:
Starbuck wrote on Oct 15
th, 2008 at 6:00pm:
Pretentious Poet wrote on Oct 15
th, 2008 at 5:07pm:
Every Dem down in RO liked Barry a lot...
But the Riff, who lived just north of Newark, did NOT!
The Riff hated Barry! Bitched the whole ‘lection season!
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, that his buns were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all,
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.
Whatever the reason, his heart or dairy airrey,
He stood there on Election Eve, hating the Barry!
Staring down from his cave with a sour, Riffy frown,
At the warm lighted windows in good RO town.
For he knew every Dem in that hood, rain or shine,
Was hanging a Barry O nice campaign sign.
“And they’re wearing their buttons! And they’re having such fun!
They’re all goddamned drones. Every last f**king one!
That Barry O guy – he just gives me the scares.
He hangs out with Pfleger and Wright and Bill Ayres!”
The Riff shouted loudly, scratching his crotch,
“He’s a lousy, US hating Marxist beyatch!”
And the Riff rampaged on, but he didn’t understand
The reasons why Barry’ll soon lead this land.
We’ve had 8 years of hell and are now in recession
That’s turned out so bad it could be a depression.
Retirements crashed, the price of gas soaring,
Countries all round the world the US are abhorring,
And worstest of all, a failed war in Iraq
That Bush went and launched about four or five years back.
You may not like Barry, you may find him adverse,
But after 8 years of W, it can’t get much worse!
dude needs to shrink his avatar.
freakin' idiot.
Hey, but he is one hell of a poet!!
Why don't ya help him with his avatar, Bucky!!!
Gonna save this one.. it is so damn good!!!
Definitely a Pretentious Poe classic. I don't know if it's in the same league as Quoth the Palin but still, one of his finer works from the Election Oh Eight Era.
As a guy who frequents flea markets, yard sales, and other out-of-the-way avenues of economy in order to earn my income, I come across strange literary artifacts from time to time. While digging through a box of disused and moldy old papers, I came across what I believe to be an alternate or rejected stanza from the above poem. I present it here as a sort of literary bootleg.
As election day neared and the polls were a showing
support for The One called NObama was growing
The Riff had to face the fact that his boast
That the One was nothing but this morning's toast
looked like it might have been a bad call
When Barack hung Wright's picture on the White House wall
And in Congress all of the Dems were installed
THEN They'd do something Riff liked least of all!
Every Dem down in DC, the tall and the small
Would stand close together, mandate howls blending.
They'd stand hand-in-hand.
And the Dems would start spending!
They'd spend! And they'd spend!
And they'd SPEND!
SPEND!
SPEND!
SPEND!
And the more the Riff thought of this DemoRatSpend
The more the idea burned his nether end!
And he howled "HOW CAN YOU IDJITS DEFEND
a manchild who would call all these bad people 'friend'?"
the Riff thought, "I just wish this whole thing would end!"
"Why, for the last eights years I've been in shit like a sow!"
"I MUST stop this election from coming!
...But HOW?"