David Lee Roth's groin is in my face. The lead singer of Van Halen is wearing snakeskin (and skin-tight) pants that probably shouldn't be worn by anybody, never mind a 54-year-old, and right now we're being treated to a groin-shot displayed on the massive TV screens either side of the stage.

It was in1608 that French explorer Samuel de Champlain founded Quebec City, and 400 years to the day, Van Halen are here to help the locals celebrate with free concert. The band's connection seems tenuous, though I guess 400 years is close to the combined age of the members.

Tens of thousands of Quebecois and tourists have turned out at the city's major parkland, the Plains of Abraham for the gig. Tonight, there seem to be plenty of middle-aged men in the crowd enjoying a nostalgia trip, while the rest of us groan our way through the seemingly endless guitar and drum solos,  waiting for Panama and Jump (the latter closes the set).

Quebec may be a small city by global standards, with 622,000 residents, but it is celebrating in a big way. The city has a summer festival every year, but with this year's anniversary, the city has pulled out all stops to deliver a celebration to remember. Immediately after Van Halen's performance, the St Lawrence River explodes in what's is reportedly the biggest fireworks display in Canadian history.

And while Van Halen's free gig might be considered lame by anyone under the age of, say, 45, two nights later the coolness pendulum swings the other way when Canada's own so-hot-right-now alterno-pop star Fiest performs. The city is also buzzing with the news that Paul McCartney has been confirmed for a free concert on July 20.

Of course, with 95 per cent of the local population speaking French as a first language, there are plenty of French-speaking acts too, though most of these are playing in the lower profile afternoon slots.

Quebec's celebrations have undergone years of Olympics-style preparation, with the first events kicking off last New Year's Eve. The uglier parts of the city's waterfront have been transformed, with a temporary display of emphemeral gardens created combining art and horticulture. The city's enormous grain silo , something of an eyesore in the Old Port, has undergone the most extraordinary change of all.

Local director and playwright Robert Lepage has transformed the still-working mill into the world's largest projection screen - 600 metres in length, with 27 separate projectors working together to create an extraordinary animated journey through the city's history. The call from visitors is that it should become a permanent attraction, though the likelihood is it will close as scheduled on August 24.

The celebrations have not been without controversy. Critics attacked the opening events at the start of the year as childish, while the Prime Minister Stephen Harper upset Quebec separatists by suggesting the anniversary commemorates the founding not only of Quebec, but of Canada itself (even though Canada, as a country, wasn't founded by the British until 1863).

Controversy aside, the Quebecois are making the most of the year, and any visitors to the grand old town are likely to find plenty worth celebrating, even if they're not fans of aging rockers.

robpop wrote on Jul 10^th, 2008 at 1:31pm:

robpop wrote on Jul 10^th, 2008 at 1:42pm:

robpop wrote on Jul 10^th, 2008 at 3:13pm:

not likely to stick.

Some Guy wrote on Jul 10^th, 2008 at 3:41pm:

robpop wrote on Jul 10^th, 2008 at 4:09pm:

Nellcote wrote on Jul 9^th, 2008 at 6:45pm:



peanut m&m's?

Nellcote wrote on Jul 9^th, 2008 at 6:45pm:



The phoney David Lee Roth.

It's a story that circulated around the world: Rock star David Lee Roth saved by two OPP officers after suffering a severe allergic reaction to nuts while driving on a country road near Brantford.

This newspaper even had a followup to the original wire service story about how the Van Halen singer, dressed in flashy rock-star duds, strutted into a Brantford bar with two nurses after spending the evening in Brantford General Hospital. Only problem: It's not true.

The two officers and a lot of other people in the area appear to be victims of a charming imposter.

And the rock star himself issued a statement last night, saying, "I was in Canada only from July first through the fourth for a performance at the Quebec City Summer Festival. I had no encounters or incidents with the police.

"The only thing I'm allergic to is criticism. -- Love, Dave."

His personal publicist, Elaine Schock said, "I don't even understand where (the account) came from. David doesn't drive himself. He has a driver. And he doesn't dress flashy unless he's onstage."

This, of course, came as a bit of a shock to the two OPP officers who entered the name "David Lee Roth" into their report of the May 23 incident and later described his flashy dress to CTV news.

The officers weren't the only ones fooled. Club patrons, hospital employees, hair stylists, music producers and performers all thought they had spent some quality time with Diamond Dave.

"I'm actually trying to figure out what's going on here, myself," said OPP Constable Larry Plummer.

"I've been researching ... I'm finding it hard to believe. The first thing we're going to have to do is identify who this person might be."

Later in the day, Plummer confirmed it couldn't have been Roth whom the two young officers saved.

"On May 23, the day this was supposed to have happened, Roth was performing at Madison Square Garden with Van Halen," he said.

Plummer said the officers never asked for identification when they stopped the Mystery Dave's rented car for erratic driving near Oakland, a hamlet south of Brantford.

"They were too concerned with helping a man who was in medical distress," Plummer added. Police, however, continue to investigate the identity of the mystery man.

After being treated in hospital, Mystery Dave took two nurses to the nearby Liquid Lounge, where he got up and performed with a local band. He even had his picture taken with at least one of them.

Liquid Lounge owner Cheri Welsh was drawn in by the flashy scarves and alligator shoes.

"I can't understand his motives," she said yesterday. "It's not like he was getting free drinks or anything. He was putting money on the table."

Even Phatstick -- the St. Catharines band that jammed out Van Halen's Ice Cream Man with him at the bar -- was impressed.

"We weren't totally convinced at first because so many people come to shows saying they are someone famous or related to a star," said drummer Joe Lavergne. "But in Dave's case, he did pretty well."

The Mystery Dave also went to the U Are Beautiful salon in Cambridge several times for tanning treatments, hair cuts and dye jobs.

"He always paid in cash," said Lesley, who asked that her last name not be used. "He even bought gift certificates."

Lesley said the salon gave him one free treatment when he said he was going on MuchMusic. He gave them a private concert in the salon. Lesley said they were initially suspicious because of a gap in the man's teeth, but he explained he always wore a cap when he went onstage.

And Dean Hajas, a local songwriter and recording engineer, said he's still certain the man who stayed at his house for three weeks is the real David Lee Roth.

"He just phoned me out of the blue and asked if he could come over and do some work," Hajas said. "He's got some of my music ... I talked to him on his cellphone yesterday and he said his publicist would be issuing a press release (today) to clear this mess up."

Roth's publicist admits the bizarre story has helped her keep her client's name in the news.

"And it's not like it's bad press, it's just odd press," Schock said, adding: "He doesn't stay in places like this. Dave is a Four Seasons kind of a guy."

www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp23NHWBd6A