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I became a widow Nov. 27th (Read 6,867 times)
Ian Billen
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #25 - Dec 11th, 2016 at 11:28pm
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I was very sorry to log-in today at Rocks Off and see this. I'm so sorry and I can only 'imagine' how difficult this is. Deepest sympathy.



Ian
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Freya Gin
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #26 - Dec 18th, 2016 at 7:24pm
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Thank all of you for your condolences and sympathy.

It was 3 weeks today. I'm at my friend's house, drinking apple pie moonshine.

This year has been hell. I'm really thinking that I won't have anyone or anything left before this damn year is over.

My sister and I got together after the funeral. It was the first time I'd seen her in 15 years. We were talking about getting together in the coming year, maybe visiting New Mexico. I was so glad to have my sister back. She died 10 days after my husband. She was trying to get to her Nitro pills but apparently didn't get to them in time. She was only 52. I suppose I should be grateful that I got those last few days with her but I can't help but feel that I got my sister back only to lose her again almost immediately.

On the bright side it was easy for me to get government health insurance (Anthem) and food stamps. I still have no income and thus can't pay the rent, get my laundry done or afford other necessities. Wish me luck.
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #27 - Dec 19th, 2016 at 7:57pm
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That is so sad about your sister.
Wishing you luck and hope for the New Year. When you are at the bottom there is only one way left to go, and that's up.
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #28 - Dec 20th, 2016 at 4:50pm
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Oh Freya! I am so trully sorry. This is so weird. I have liver damage due to the medication I have to live on. God! I  know I'm going to flatline early, and I've watched it working in hospitals. I pray he didn't suffer.

But you what? People think I'm Spooky, they think I'm a nutter because I feel; what shall I call it?Prescences, sorry spelt that wrong but, tough. I don't mean ghosts, or shit, just a vague sense of the well; departed. So he's still with you in some sense. Call me crazy but I've dealing with one since 1978. They're all around when you need them. You just have to tune in. But I am so sorry Freya, take care luv.
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Freya Gin
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #29 - Dec 22nd, 2016 at 1:20pm
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gypsymofo60 wrote on Dec 20th, 2016 at 4:50pm:
Oh Freya! I am so trully sorry. This is so weird. I have liver damage due to the medication I have to live on. God! I  know I'm going to flatline early, and I've watched it working in hospitals. I pray he didn't suffer.

But you what? People think I'm Spooky, they think I'm a nutter because I feel; what shall I call it?Prescences, sorry spelt that wrong but, tough. I don't mean ghosts, or shit, just a vague sense of the well; departed. So he's still with you in some sense. Call me crazy but I've dealing with one since 1978. They're all around when you need them. You just have to tune in. But I am so sorry Freya, take care luv.


I don't think you're crazy. I've had my own experiences that have convinced me that death of one's physical body is not the end. I know that he and my sister are still around.

I hope you get your liver and the rest of you taken care of. We didn't know he had liver problems until it was too late because he resisted going to the doctor as much as he possibly could. He only suffered about a month before he died, fortunately. I've seen a lot worse, especially when  my mother had cancer.
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #30 - Dec 23rd, 2016 at 2:25pm
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Hope things get better for you.
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Freya Gin
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Re: I became a widow Nov. 27th
Reply #31 - Dec 25th, 2016 at 12:03am
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Thank you, SW.

Well, I've gotten through my first Christmas Eve without him since 1987 without crying. I doubt I'll make it through tomorrow without tears though. Still, I count every day I get through without crying as a victory.
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